Love of the Familiar – A Roadblock to Repentance

Never underestimate the power of the familiar. It has kept countless people from change, even when change would save their very lives.

(Every Thursday we’ll post something to do with Emotional Issues or Relational issues. Hope it helps) --- Love of the Familiar – A Roadblock to Repentance After years of being immersed in the use of porn and sexual acting out, I had to honestly ask myself, when I repented, how I was going to learn to live without these things I’d so relied on? They were wrong, sure. But boy, were they reliable! Reliable, deeply ingrained and, most of all familiar. Jesus makes an interesting reference to the love of the familiar when He refers to Continue Reading

A Peace Too Costly

Winston Churchill 1941 photo by Yousuf Karsh

Every Wednesday we’ll post a message having to do with doctrine and purity. Hope it helps. --- A Peace Too Costly “You have been given the choice between war and dishonor. You have chosen dishonor, and you will have war!” -Winston Churchill to the English Parliament, 1938 After the English Parliament’s 1938 appeasement in Czechoslovakia, Churchill saw the danger of choosing peace, when honor and common sense called for battle. History, of course, would confirm his point: Refusing to fight an honorable battle may afford a temporary peace, Continue Reading

Mrs. Interrogator – Am I Ever Gonna Be Off The Hot Seat?

hotseat

Every Tuesday we’ll be posting an article about restoring and strengthening marriages that have been damaged by sexual sin. Hope it helps. --- Mrs. Interrogator (“Am I Ever Gonna Be Off the Hot Seat?”) It happens often – a husband has a secret sin (porn, affair, etc.) that gets exposed, his wife is shattered but forgives him, so they begin rebuilding. But she still can barely wrap her mind around what he’s done, and wonders how he was capable of such a thing, so the questions start. Relentlessly. Frequently. Unpredictably. “How Continue Reading

I’ve Got a Problem – A Big One. So Now What? (Part 2 of a 3 Part Series)

confession

  Every Monday I’ll be posting something to do with personal recovery and maintaining sexual integrity under the category “Keeping it Clean” Hope it you find it helpful. --- “I’ve Got a Problem – A Big One. So Now What?” (Part Two of a Three Part Series) You wouldn’t believe the stories I hear from men who’ve had their sin exposed, especially the details of how God allowed it to come to light! Sometimes their wives woke up in the middle of the night, felt led by God to push a button or two on the computer, and boom! Up Continue Reading

Random Ramblings from a Fellow Struggler #3

joe 2

Every Friday we’ll take a break from topical posts and will post some random personal thoughts. --- It can be interesting and helpful to look at what you’re going through and ask, “What’s the lesson here, and what’ll my homework be?” Everything we experience is, after all Father-Filtered, in that God allows it with some purpose in mind. (Romans 8:28) So Renee and I are trying, with some success, to break the pattern of reflexively stressing over the different situations getting thrown at us, and instead examine them for clues as to Continue Reading

Entitlement: Rejecting Divine Authority

faith

Entitlement: Rejecting Divine Authority The sin of Entitlement, which is the rejection of God’s authority, is one of the commonest problems among the men I work with. (And, to talk turkey, I’d have to say it’s one of my most besetting sins.) It was also Lucifer’s original sin when he plotted to become like God, usurping His position. (Isaiah 14: 12-15) It was Adam’s sin when he willingly disobeyed, (Genesis 3:6) That’s Entitlement – a mindset that’s exposed by our behavior when we act as though we answer to no one but Continue Reading

Playing The Game – It’s Serious Business!

the game

Every Wednesday we’ll post a message concerning doctrine and its role in our purity. Hope it’s useful. Playing the Game – It’s Serious Business! I often encourage my clients to enter into The Game, which is the contest you enter into when you commit yourself to purity. When you regularly give in to sexual sin, you in essence “go with the flow” of the world, the flesh and even Satan. No contest there - you surrendered. Paul describes this surrender pretty well to the Ephesians when he refers to their past: “Wherein in time past you walked Continue Reading

Blaming the Mrs. – Adding Injustice to Injury

sad wife

Every Tuesday we’ll be posting an article about restoring and strengthening marriages that have been damaged by sexual sin. Hope it’s helpful. --- Blaming the Mrs. - Adding Injustice to Injury Sex scandals and car accidents have much in common - injured parties, public spectacle, and charges hurled every which way amidst an abrupt, life changing tragedy. They both attract and repel us as we drive by, shaking our disapproving heads even as we crane our necks to see more. It’s been, in fact, a bit of a national pastime, this Continue Reading

I’ve Got a Problem – A Big One. So Now What? (Part 1 of a 3 Part Series)

confession

Every Monday I’ll be posting something to do with personal recovery and maintaining sexual integrity under the category “Keeping it Clean” Hope it you find it helpful.   “I’ve Got a Problem – A Big One. So Now What?” (Part One of a Three Part Series) Since you’re reviewing this website my guess is you’re either in crises over your sexual behavior, or you want to avoid ever having that sort of crises. And why shouldn’t you? You’ve got other plans, after all - a family, a home, or a certain type of job or career.  Or maybe Continue Reading

Random Ramblings from a Fellow Struggler #2

joe 2

Every Friday we’ll break away from the topic format, and instead post some random thoughts about current events, spiritual issues or personal matters. Congressman Anthony Weiner stepped down. Good move; ‘bout time. Seems he finally realized this sort of scandal renders him ineffective publicly. I never knew much about the man prior to this, except that he was one of the more bombastic types with a caustic tongue. His past interviews bear this out – sneering, sarcastic responses to people who disagreed with or challenged him; arrogant and Continue Reading