Beware the Grudge

Grudge

A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers. -Ruth Bell Graham   Continue Reading

Unmasked in Marriage

the phantom gl

Damn you! You little prying Pandora! You little demon - is this what you wanted to see? Curse you, you little lying Delilah! You little viper Now you cannot ever be free! -The Phantom once he's unmasked, from Lloyd-Webber's 'Phantom of the Opera' Continue Reading

Staying Power

Armed

“By our Heavenly Father and only because of God, only because of God. We're like other couples. We do not get along perfectly; we do not go without arguments and, as I call them, fights, and heartache and pain and hurting each other.  But a marriage is three of us.” -Christian entertainer Barbara Mandrell, answering the question of why her marriage works   I know my wife loves me. But I think it’s taken more than that to keep her with me for 28 years. She also loves, and is obedient to, God. And that’s where a Christian marriage gets its Continue Reading

The Compartmentalizer

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"If you follow a universal principle, it positively impacts all areas of your life. Universal principles don't compartmentalize." -Steve Pavlina   Year after year, I hear wives agonize over the choices their husbands made. “What was he thinking?” they’ll cry, “and how could he do a thing like that if he loved me?” Continue Reading

Wondering What She Thinks I’m Worth

Worth

I once dreamed that my wife Renee was auctioning me off on e-Bay. Without the courtesy of any notice, mind you, so I had the double indignity of learning that I was on the market, and that my seller hadn’t even bothered to tell me. Continue Reading

Slaughtering Hope

couple arguing

One should rather die than be betrayed. There is no deceit in death. It delivers exactly what it promised. Betrayal, though — betrayal is the willful slaughter of hope. – Playright Steven Deitz   Continue Reading

Of Headship and Headaches

Power Struggle

In the classic movie farce Some Like It Hot, Jack Lemmon, disguised as a woman, dances a tango with a gent who thinks Lemmon’s a lady, and a lovely one at that. But the man has one complaint. “You’re leading again!” he keeps pointing out. Accustomed to taking the lead as a male, Jack’s now finding it hard to dance as a follower. But unless one of them yields, the tango’s going nowhere. Continue Reading

The Angry Wife

conflict

It seems nothing works with her. A kind word is met with a rebuff. Touching and lovemaking are out of the question. Any little thing (or nothing at all) seems to set her off, and she’s willing to shout, accuse or cut down at a moment’s notice. She’s an angry wife, and she’s not alone. Plenty of marriages are falling apart, largely because of a husband’s sin, a wife’s ongoing anger over the sin, and the couple’s inability to deal with the fallout. What to do? In fairness, let’s first admit that some men and women are simply angry people. Continue Reading

A Banquet Defiled

Banquet

Several years ago, while teaching a marriage retreat seminar, I learned a striking lesson from one of the attending wives. Continue Reading

Honey I Shrunk the Id

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They used to drum it into Psych students as a foundational truth – Freud’s Structural Hypothesis, the theory that our minds are composed of a triune entity called Id, Ego and Super-Ego. Continue Reading